One of my Bustle readers recently wrote to me with the following question:

I’ve been with my guy for about six months. Things are great, but there’s just one issue with our sex life. I feel so much pressure to orgasm during sex with him that it feels like I’m giving myself performance anxiety! I used to be able to orgasm from sex pretty readily, but it has been so much different with him. He asks me, “are you close yet?” during sex. I never used to worry about how much time I was taking, but that question made me feel like he was getting impatient and wanted me to hurry up. It’s like I can feel myself freezing up when he asks it. Then he says that he feels inadequate because he can’t make me orgasm. I know he means well. I don’t know why I’m being so sensitive about these tiny things. Why am I having so much performance anxiety with him when I’ve never had problems before? How can I get myself to go back to normal?

In the article, I share six steps for banishing performance anxiety and creating a more supportive environment with your partner. Check out all of my advice over on Bustle!