Your desire has two modes – “Drive” and “Reverse”.

When you’re in Drive, you want sex

The intensity of your desire can vary. Sometimes you feel a really strong active desire; other times you feel a more subtle openness to the possibility of sex.

When you’re in Reverse, you don’t want sex

Here too, the intensity can vary. Sometimes you just can’t be bothered; other times sex sounds like the worst thing in the world.

There are tons of different factors that can put you in Drive, filling you with anticipation, excitement, and desire.

And there are plenty of factors that can put you in Reverse, making you feel uninterested in or avoidant of sex.

You need to know what puts you in Drive and what puts you in Reverse

Most of us feel powerless when it comes to our sex drives, like there’s nothing we can do to influence them.

But you absolutely can have control over your desire.

If you understand what makes you tick, you can take active steps towards giving yourself what you need.

Understanding your Drive and Reverse modes also helps balance mismatched sex drives in a relationship. If both you and your partner know what you need, you can work together as a team to create a sex life that feels exciting and fulfilling to you both.

Want to learn how your sex drive works?

I’ve put together a worksheet to help you learn how to shift out of Reverse and put yourself into Drive.

It’s part of an ongoing sex drive series that I’ve been working on. You may have seen my previous post about sex drive types, and why you need to know which type you are. All you need to do to get both resources is enter your name and email address below!