I was recently asked by the New York Times to write about my experiences as a sex therapist.
I’ve been interviewed by the Times before, but getting to write my own piece for them has been one of the highlights of my career.
My first article tackles one of the most common issues I come across in my work with couples – how to navigate social media boundaries in your relationship.
Here’s a small snippet of the article:
Prioritize Quality Time Without Social Media
The most common social media-related fight I hear from clients is how much time their partners spend on Facebook or Instagram. I hear story after story of couples planning a romantic date night that turns into nothing but chatter about Instagram likes, Twitter favorites and Snapchat views.
The behavior even extends into the bedroom: Clients have told me stories of discreet mid-coitus phone check-ins.
“A cigarette and embrace after sex has quickly been replaced with a scroll through social media,” said Gillian McCallum, chief executive of Drawing Down the Moon Matchmaking, a British dating website. “Men and women are guilty of reaching for their phone and basking in the glow of their screen rather than the afterglow of lovemaking.”
You should always make your partner feel more important to you than your phone, so dedicate at least 20 minutes a day to spending screen-free time together. (Scrolling through Facebook while watching television won’t cut it.)
Of course, more social media-free time is better, if you can swing it. You may like having all your meals be phone-free (or at least having those phones on silent or in airplane mode). Or try turning off notifications when you’re together.
You can read the full piece here.