Reader’s Request Fridays: Is It Weird That I Don’t Like Porn?

April 03,2015

Welcome to Reader’s Request Fridays! This week’s question comes from Leslie*, who writes, “Is it weird that I don’t like porn? I consider myself a pretty modern person. I’m not conservative or anti-porn. I just think the porn that is out there is gross. I mentioned this to my girlfriends recently, and they all called me an old-fashioned prude. Am I??”

Is It Weird That I Don't Like Porn? | Vanessa Marin Sex Therapy

Hi Leslie,

Thanks for the question!

The quick and easy answer to your question is a resounding “NO!” There’s absolutely nothing wrong with not liking porn, just as there’s nothing wrong with not liking apples, not liking the color blue, or not liking country music. It’s just a personal preference!

Isn’t it sad how we can shame each other about sex in so many different ways? If you actually did like porn, I bet you’d have a different group of people in your life who would shame you for liking it! When it comes to sex, sometimes it can feel like you just can’t win.

So, no, there’s nothing wrong with you for not liking porn.

That being said, it might be possible that you don’t like porn because you haven’t seen any good porn yet. Most mainstream porn is terrible. It’s degrading to women, it depicts sex in strange ways, it’s cheesy, and it doesn’t even look visually appealing.

If mainstream porn is all you’ve seen, I wouldn’t be surprised that you aren’t a fan. But there’s more to porn than just the mainstream stuff. It’s like only ever eating Panda Express and saying you don’t like Chinese food.

If you’re curious about your relationship with porn, you could try to spend time looking at different types of porn and see if you find anything that does appeal to you. There’s nothing to lose by doing a little exploring! At the very least, you’d get confirmation that porn just isn’t your thing.

Should you feel so inclined, here are some possible avenues to explore:

Happy hunting!

 

*Names have been changed for privacy

 

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HI THERE!

I'm Vanessa Marin, a sex therapist and writer specializing in helping you have more fun in the bedroom.

I have bachelor’s degrees in human sexuality and sociology from Brown University, and a master’s degree in counseling psychology from the California Institute of Integral Studies. I’m also a licensed psychotherapist. I’ve been working in the sex therapy field since 2002 and have been featured by The New York Times, O: The Oprah Magazine, Real Simple, and many more.

If you’re interested in improving your sex life, you can work with me via my online courses or personal coaching sessions. I look forward to supporting you in creating the sex life you’ve always wanted!