Oh the joys of hotel sex! There are very few sexual acts that are as consistently and utterly revered as hotel sex.

I mean, what’s not to love? You’re removed from the responsibilities of everyday life. You know that no one is going to bother you. There’s the novelty and anonymity of being in a new place and knowing you’ll never see any of these people again. The room is all yours for at least one evening. Sex just feels so much more exciting and enticing in a hotel room.

It doesn’t matter if your relationship is strained or you haven’t had sex in months – most couples will end up taking full advantage of the opportunities provided by a hotel room.

I recommend regular weekend getaways to most of my clients, but sometimes it’s not always logistically possible (or not possible as often as you’d like!). If that’s the case, there are some creative ways that you can mimic the experience of being in a hotel. With a little bit of effort, you and your partner can set yourself up for a hot night of hotel-like sex this weekend.

 

Make a gameplan

Spend some time tonight thinking about your favorite hotel sex experiences with each other. Try to identify the particular details that made that sexual experience better than others. Maybe you really enjoyed the spa-like bathroom, the fluffy pillows and blankets, or the fully-stocked mini bar. Perhaps you two were more sexually adventurous than you normally are at home.

If you and your partner have never had hotel sex together, talk in general about what you think you might like about it.

 

Remove distractions

Make a plan to remove all distractions from the rest of the weekend. Send your kids with their grandparents. Drop your pets off with a sitter. Tell friends and colleagues that you’re turning off all electronics for the weekend. Politely get out of any commitments you may have made.

 

Set the scene

On Saturday, spend the early part of the day cleaning up your home (or hire someone to do it for you). Put everything away and get your place looking spic and span.

Pretend that you are inviting some very prestigious guests over, and think about the little touches you could incorporate to make your home even more inviting. Make your home feel as luxurious and spa-like as possible.

It’s really the little details that matter – setting out gourmet snacks, lighting candles, turning up the thermostat, artfully arranging throws and pillows, gathering a stack of reading materials, putting out an iPod dock.

It may feel silly to do these things in your own home, but they do make all the difference.

Pay particular attention to your bed and bathroom. If you haven’t already, invest in high-quality linens. and luxurious toiletries.

Next time you are at a hotel that has blankets or sheets that you love, ask the front desk for the brand names. Same goes for the little soaps, shampoos, conditioners, candles, and bath salts that most people love using in hotels.

 

Build the anticipation

Once you’ve finished setting things up, leave together. Go do something relaxing and enjoyable, like grabbing a meal or a drink, going on a walk, or hanging out at a park.

Stay out of your house for most of the day. Make dinner reservations or plan to have someone deliver a decadent meal straight to your house.

Try to build up some anticipation for the evening. Most people have had great hotel sex, and they assume they are going to have sex during their stay. The sexual tension and anticipation can build for days or weeks.

See if you can stoke some of those flames this weekend. You can talk to each other about your excitement for the evening, or just think about your growing desire in your own mind.

Come back to your home together in the early evening. Take a few minutes to soak up the soothing and welcoming atmosphere set up before you. Keep all electronics off.

 

Luxuriate

Take your time. Just relax and enjoy each other’s company. Light a fire. Feed each other a light snack. Change into comfortable clothing, a silky gown, or a spa-like robe. Take a long bath or shower together. Spend time kissing, cuddling, and touching each other.

 

Explore

See if you can let go of some of your usual sexual inhibitions.

There really is something about hotel sex that makes people feel comfortable being more adventurous and experimental than they usually allow themselves. Try to allow yourself the same freedom.

Here are some more specific ideas:

• Put on fancy lingerie

• Try a new sexual position

• Experiment with a different sexual act

• Use a sex toy

• Be louder and more vocal than usual

• Role play or act out a fantasy

• Have sex in different places – draped over the couch, on top of the desk, on the floor, in the bathtub

Sleep in on Sunday! Let the luxuriating and relaxing continue. Don’t plan anything for the rest of the day. Don’t clean up after yourselves (isn’t that one of the greatest parts of a hotel stay?). Lounge around in bed for as long as you want.
 

Happy Sexperimenting!