I have written before about the importance of being aware of your feelings and checking in with yourself to see what you are feeling. A related and equally important step is acknowledging your feelings. While the distinction between being aware of a feeling and acknowledging a feeling may seem quite small, in actuality, the difference can be profound. Try to think of a time when you were aware that you were feeling a certain way, but had a hard time admitting what you were feeling. For example, you may have felt sexually aroused around your partner, but tried to cut yourself off from those feelings because you knew your partner was likely to reject your advances. Or you may have felt sad about being passed over for a promotion, but attempted to ignore the feeling in service of being positive and keeping a cheery outlook. There are many reasons why we try to ignore our feelings even when we know we are feeling them.

To get a sense of what it feels like to acknowledge your feelings, try out this simple exercise for 10 minutes, an hour, or even an entire day: Whenever you notice yourself having a feeling, say “yes” to the feeling. Use the sentence, “Yes, I am feeling (blank) right now” – “Yes, I’m feeling annoyed right now.” “Yes, I’m feeling lonely right now.” “Yes, I’m feeling confused right now.” Saying “yes” doesn’t mean that you’re happy about or comfortable with having the feeling. It only means that you are acknowledging that you are actually feeling that particular feeling. Notice how this feels different from the way you usually relate to your feelings. You can also see if it feels harder to say “yes” to certain feelings than it is to others.

Interested in developing a deeper relationship with or understanding of your feelings? Call (415) 658-5738 or visit my Appointments page to set up a consultation.