The University of Maryland recently released some research on the effect our dreams have on our waking actions, particularly within the confines of romantic relationships. Most of us have had dreams or nightmares about our partners. Infidelity dreams are common, as are themes of loss, jealousy, neglect, or disconnection. Sometimes these dreams seem to have literal roots – we may have witnessed our partner engaging in some not-so-innocent flirting or recently had a big fight – but other times they seem to come out of nowhere. You may have had the experience of waking up terrified, angry, or upset with your partner, even though your conscious mind registers that it was only a dream. What this new research reveals is that the feelings left over from our dreams can have actual consequences in our relationships.

The University of Maryland tracked the dreams of 61 participants, and had them log the quality of their relationships. They found that the tone of the dream was likely to carry on to the next day, and influence the actions the dreamer took towards their partner, as well as their feelings about the relationship. Lead author Dylan Selterman writes,

For example, after a dream involving a high degree of jealousy, the dreamer was more likely to report conflict with their partner during the day. Similarly, arguing in dreams was associated with next-day relationship conflict, while dreamer infidelity was linked with reduced feelings of love or intimacy afterward.

Interestingly, the researchers also noted that the overall strength of the relationship could mitigate the effects of the dreams. So a healthier relationship can better withstand the occasional infidelity dream, while the same dream could have a bigger impact on a less serious relationship.

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