How to STOP Getting Distracted During Sex!

March 17, 2022

#43

Have you ever been in the middle of some HOT sex and all of a sudden you start thinking about something completely unrelated? Maybe you need to get a babysitter for next weekend or you totally forgot to send that email to your boss.

Regardless of what you’re distracted by, it can be so frustrating and you can end up feeling powerless to your thoughts. You may even feel self-judgment or shame that you’re not able to stay focused during sex.

In this episode we’re giving you lots of practical tools for how you (and your partner) can navigate distractions and stay more present during sex.

In this episode, you’ll learn:

  • How different genders experience distraction during sex
  • Five tips for staying present
  • Additional resources for helping you feel less distracted

Here’s a glance at this episode:

[02:38] What mental load is.

[03:47] Why it’s so hard to carry the mental load.

[04:32] Fascinating poll results about people’s least-favorite mental load tasks.

[11:00] Why women are socialized to carry the majority of the mental load.

[13:25] How mental load can ruin your relationship.

[15:06] The specific impact of mental load on your sex life.

[22:23] Our best tips for balancing mental load in your relationship.

[48:35] Listener question: Why isn’t it a two-way street? There is no mental load that my partner bears for the family.

[49:41] Listener question: How do you help your partner understand mental load?

[51:00] Listener question: I’m a stay-at-home mom and my partner works. I feel bad asking him to do things since he works a stressful job all day.

[53:05] Listener question: My partner says it’s not fair for me to expect him to read my mind.

[54:07] Listener question: How do I remind my partner to do their mental load tasks? If I don’t remind him, he won’t remember.

[1:00:04] What if my partners learning their new tasks affects the family? For example, forgetting to pack snacks for the kids.

Links & resources

Mental Load Workbook

Dirty Talk 101

30 Day Sex Challenge

Foreplay Guides

Sex Position Playbook

If you enjoyed this episode, make sure to subscribe for your weekly double date full of totally doable sex tips, practical relationship advice, hilarious and honest stories of what really goes on behind closed bedroom doors and so much more. It’s the sex education you wish you had!

Also listen on

hey there!