The Hygiene Episode: What To Do If Your Partner Isn’t Taking Care Of Themselves

April 07,2022

If you’re like many people, hygiene seems pretty basic. Take a shower, brush your teeth, wear deodorant, what’s so hard about that?

So you may find yourself confused about why your partner can’t seem to take good care of themselves.

How can your partner expect you to want to kiss them, have sex with them, or even be attracted to them in the first place if they haven’t kept up basic hygiene habits?

In today’s episode, we’re tackling the topic you’ve been dying for us to address: your partner’s hygiene – or lack thereof.

In this episode, you’ll learn:

Here’s a glance at this episode:

[00:52] Why we’re doing this episode and why this topic is so much more complex than it seems

[06:46] Instagram polls! How many people are struggling with their partner’s hygiene and what are the most common complaints?

[09:27] What shocked us the most from these responses

[11:00] Why is this so complicated? Why can’t they just pick up a damn toothbrush?

[12:16] An example of cultural differences when it comes to hygiene

[15:29] The TRUTH (or lack thereof) about hygiene!

[17:31] What to do before talking to your partner about their hygiene

[18:38] The most common reason for bad hygiene, an eye-opening poll, and some stories from our community

[21:15] The fear/hygiene connection — Xander gives a personal example

[24:09] Weight gain and hygiene

[28:07] How to proceed if you want to talk to your partner about their hygiene

[30:16] What to do if you think your partner is struggling with mental health issues

[32:56] A sweet story from our community and a great example of how to kindly help your partner take care of themselves

Links & resources

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I'm Vanessa Marin, a sex therapist and writer specializing in helping you have more fun in the bedroom.

I have bachelor’s degrees in human sexuality and sociology from Brown University, and a master’s degree in counseling psychology from the California Institute of Integral Studies. I’m also a licensed psychotherapist. I’ve been working in the sex therapy field since 2002 and have been featured by The New York Times, O: The Oprah Magazine, Real Simple, and many more.

If you’re interested in improving your sex life, you can work with me via my online courses or personal coaching sessions. I look forward to supporting you in creating the sex life you’ve always wanted!