Putting The O Back In Mom: Reigniting Your Sex Life After Kids

July 21,2022

Are you struggling to have a great sex life now that you’re a mom?

As women, we wear so many hats and have so many identities. We’re wives, girlfriends, daughters, sisters, friends, and mothers. But what happens when these identities feel like they’re in conflict with one another?

A whopping 91% of our Instagram followers said their sex life got harder after kids. We heard things like, “It’s hard to feel confident in my new body,” “Everyone always needs something, and I’m tired of giving,” and, “I’m just EXHAUSTED!”

In this episode, we’re here to give you practical tips to creating the sex life you deserve!

In this episode, you’ll learn:

Here’s a glance at this episode:

[3:07] A small sampling of the MANY responses from our Instagram audience

[7:03] Milfs, Dilfs, and Pilfs!

[8:45] Just the tip: the first of our 5 tips to reconnect with your sexuality

[13:31] Teamwork makes the dream work! Alternately: Choreplay

[17:46] Pro tip from Xander to his fellow man: asking “how can I help?” isn’t actually helpful

[20:41] How to give your partner an offer they can’t refuse

[25:15] Busting the myths that keep us from being our happiest selves

[27:40] What happens when someone else owns your nipples?

[30:16] Your heart and your vagina are twin flames

[34:10] The not-so-secret-secret about men and their emotions

[36:15] Listener Question #1: When my partner initiates it doesn’t feel sexy, it just feels like unwanted pressure to perform for them. How do I reframe this mindset?

[37:36] Listener Question #2: I just feel like a different person, like the new me and the old me have not ever met.

[39:15] Listener Question #3: My husband loves playing with my breasts, but I hate it when I am breastfeeding. How to make him understand?

Links & resources

Milfs, Dilfs, and Pilfs

Mental Load

Body Love Instagram Highlights

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I'm Vanessa Marin, a sex therapist and writer specializing in helping you have more fun in the bedroom.

I have bachelor’s degrees in human sexuality and sociology from Brown University, and a master’s degree in counseling psychology from the California Institute of Integral Studies. I’m also a licensed psychotherapist. I’ve been working in the sex therapy field since 2002 and have been featured by The New York Times, O: The Oprah Magazine, Real Simple, and many more.

If you’re interested in improving your sex life, you can work with me via my online courses or personal coaching sessions. I look forward to supporting you in creating the sex life you’ve always wanted!