Hot Takes: How We REALLY Feel About Your Most Requested Topics

September 01,2022

Definition of hot take: a quickly produced, strongly worded, and often deliberately provocative or sensational opinion or reaction. You guys are always asking us for our “hot takes” on some of the most divisive sex topics like threesomes, strip clubs, pegging, 69, and even the age old spit vs swallow debate, so we decided to put them all together in one episode!

We’re getting real and holding nothing back as we dish on over a dozen hot topics that you sent in. (Spoiler alert: we don’t agree on all of them!) Some of our answers may surprise you, but we promise you will be entertained.

In this episode, you’ll learn:

Here’s a glance at this episode:

[5:55] Disclaimer right off top

[7:40] The low down on going down – is it degrading to give a blowjob?

[9:26] Male feminist declarations

[10:45] Spit or swallow?

[12:29] Sexual self care: let’s talk facials

[14:39] Dinner for 2- $69

[16:56] The value of lingerie

[19:04] Fantasy vs Reality of the threesome

[22:09] Do loose lips sink ships?

[27:34] Balls deep in some serious smut

[34:52] Getting real about butt stuff

[37:41] V is for Vibrators!

[40:12] Get yourself a better toy

[44:02] A little vab will do ya!

[47:02] Is the danger worth the novelty of road head?

[48:21] Vanilla doesn’t have to mean boring

[50:30] Don’t be afraid of strip clubs

[53:58] Lightning round!

Links & resources

Sex Position Playbook

Foreplay Guides

YouTube on How To 69

YouTube on Facials

Also listen on


How Much Sex Should You Really Be Having?


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I'm Vanessa Marin, a sex therapist and writer specializing in helping you have more fun in the bedroom.

I have bachelor’s degrees in human sexuality and sociology from Brown University, and a master’s degree in counseling psychology from the California Institute of Integral Studies. I’m also a licensed psychotherapist. I’ve been working in the sex therapy field since 2002 and have been featured by The New York Times, O: The Oprah Magazine, Real Simple, and many more.

If you’re interested in improving your sex life, you can work with me via my online courses or personal coaching sessions. I look forward to supporting you in creating the sex life you’ve always wanted!