This Terrified Me At First, But Xander Was Right

May 29,2019

About a month ago, Xander had an idea that really shocked me.

We were having a discussion about the future of Finishing School, our online course that teaches women how to orgasm. Finishing School has been wildly successful, teaching thousands of women to have their first orgasms on their own and with a partner, getting glowing reviews from major magazines and websites, and propelling me into a internationally-recognized role as a female orgasm expert.

During this conversation, Xander turned to me and asked, “You believe that every woman deserves to orgasm, right?”

I responded, “Of course! I think orgasm is a basic human right. We all deserve to experience pleasure in our bodies.”

He replied with another question, “And you know that the methods that you teach can help any woman orgasm, right?”

“Yes”, I said. “Absolutely.”

“Then you should give your method to all women, for free.”

My heart stopped.

For free?

Was he crazy?

The methods that I’ve developed pay for our mortgage, for our car, for our medical bills. They fund my sister’s salary, and helped her pay off her student debt just a few months ago. They pay for our amazing customer service specialist, for our web guys, and for our designers. They fund donations to charities that are doing extremely important work in the world.

If we started giving key components of our courses away for free, what would that mean for our business and all that it supports?

As scared as I was in that moment, there was also a little voice, buried deep beneath all of these logical thoughts about health insurance and mortgages, that whispered, “He’s right.”

Xander IS right.

As a couple and as a company, we both firmly believe that orgasm is an essential human right.

And we believe that women have been cheated out of this right for far too long. We women have been denied even the most basic information about how our bodies and orgasm work, and we’ve been taught to be ashamed and embarrassed of ourselves and our needs.

So we’re doing something that we have never done before, and that scared the crap out of me at first.

But we’re doing it because it’s the right thing to do.

Because there’s nothing that aligns more deeply with our purpose, our mission, in this world.

We’ve put together a video series that will share the female orgasm method that I’ve developed, for free.

In these videos, you’ll learn:

Click here to sign up for the free video series!

To be clear: what I’m sharing in this video series is just a small portion of what I teach in Finishing School. (Finishing School is a super comprehensive course that goes way beyond just the mechanics of orgasm!)

But it’s our mission that every woman who watches this series will feel confident that she has the foundation that she needs to learn how to orgasm.

I want you to have the orgasms that you deserve!

And I also want to show you that female orgasm is more than just a few seconds of feeling pleasure.

I’ve always told the ladies in Finishing School that I’m a little sneaky (in a good way!) with the course; I give you the specific tools you need to orgasm, but I also show you how the journey can touch every aspect of your life, turning you into a woman who knows what she wants, feels confident asking for it, and knows that she deserves it, inside of the bedroom and out.

Here are some of the women from the last Live round of Finishing School talking about this during one of our group coaching calls:

Want to know the name of the video series?

The Female Orgasm Revolution!

Because that’s truly what we’re aiming to start here. A revolution!

It all starts this Sunday, the 26th, when the first video is released!

If you watch this free video series and you learn how to orgasm, I am going to be unbelievably thrilled for you! (And I want you to let me know!)

And if you feel curious about going deeper, and experiencing the ways that orgasm can change your entire life, I’m going to have a special invitation for you after the video series to join our 2019 Live round of Finishing School!


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I'm Vanessa Marin, a sex therapist and writer specializing in helping you have more fun in the bedroom.

I have bachelor’s degrees in human sexuality and sociology from Brown University, and a master’s degree in counseling psychology from the California Institute of Integral Studies. I’m also a licensed psychotherapist. I’ve been working in the sex therapy field since 2002 and have been featured by The New York Times, O: The Oprah Magazine, Real Simple, and many more.

If you’re interested in improving your sex life, you can work with me via my online courses or personal coaching sessions. I look forward to supporting you in creating the sex life you’ve always wanted!